Question:   I recently reported a stolen credit card, but just found out my spouse took it and didn’t tell me. I’m thinking about leaving the marriage, what should I do to protect myself?

Answer:      Making the leap to leave the marriage over any one issue is a bit excessive.

You may be angry right now, but take a few breaths and consider that it may have all just been an unfortunate misunderstanding.

Perhaps your spouse thought it was his/hers and picked it up by mistake – or assumed you wouldn’t mind. If your partner meant to take it and go on a wild spending spree, then that’s a different issue, which requires a different conversation.

First, you can safely relax when it comes to your household finances; reporting a stolen credit card protects you in several ways. It shows you are responsible and if your spouse did intend to run up a huge debt on the card, the bank will shut the account down as soon as the card is reported stolen.

If the whole issue was just a misunderstanding, you can eventually call the bank and let them know that everything is all right and that you mistakenly reported a stolen credit card. The account can then be reopened.

However, if your spouse was about to do serious damage with the card, it may be time to have a serious conversation. Find out what your partner was doing with the card and how much he/she was planning on spending. If you receive answers that you don’t like, counseling may be in order.

Should things take a turn for the worse (for example, if you know your spouse has had serious credit trouble in the past and has demonstrated a lack of responsibility even during your marriage), then more severe steps can be taken in order to protect your finances as well as your name and your financial future.

Start by contacting all your creditors and close existing accounts so your spouse will no longer have any access to them. This can defeat the possibility of another stolen credit card and more debt added to the current balance.

If you owe a balance, you will still have to repay it. If at all possible, try to bring balances to zero before closing the account, as some creditors can react negatively to people who request closed accounts before balances are repaid.

Visit your bank next and close existing deposit accounts. If your name is involved with the account along with your spouse’s, then it can be attached to you should something negative happen with it.

Whatever money is in the account, you can have the bank issue a cashier’s check for your spouse’s portion of the money and put yours into a new account that you will open only in your name.

Again, this whole issue of a stolen credit card may amount to nothing, but it can also come as a warning to you when it comes to your spouse’s spending habits. Research the fact, then proceed in a way that protects everyone involved.

» We’ve tried debt management programs, but my spouse will never change. The money is spent as quickly as it is received. Is it time to file for divorce?
You are a con-artist’s dream come true! It’s time to get your head out of the clouds. You are not going to win the lottery and the government is NOT going to fix your money problems.

» Do I need debt management software? My spouse is the financially enlightened person in the marriage. I’m trying to be better with my money, but I’m struggling to be as good. How can I do better?
For some reason there always seems to be one spouse who is financially more disciplined that the other. Perhaps it’s all part of the whole “opposites attract” thing.

» The lottery is my debt settlement program! I’m feeling lucky! After I win the lottery, what should I do with the windfall of cash?
You should never, ever, rely on sheer luck as your plan for paying off your debt. The lottery is nothing more than a way for government to take in more of your hard earning money.

Return to "Main FAQ" Page from.... Stolen Credit Card page.